An Online Dating Tip
Dear BrokenHeartedGirl,
If you're ready to start dating again and you're thinking about online dating, here's a story for you:
A girl I know showed up at the bar to meet her date. When he walked in (20 minutes late!), he looked about 5 years older and 30 pounds heavier than ALL of his 5 pictures that were online. Although she wanted to stick it to him and tell him (and the entire bar) about his warped self-perception, she stuck it out, had a drink and then left with a handshake.
She came home from this date so disappointed that she called me crying. She really wanted to quit online dating, but I asked her to keep trying and I gave her this tip:
Before you meet someone in person for the first time, ask them if they have any recent pictures. When you get them, ask for specifics - where was this taken? Who was there? Ask really specific questions - not only will you seem interested (and you are), but you may even get to see more pictures if you play your cards right.
And if he says he doesn't have a recent picture, act really flirty and ask him to send one with his camera (men, you can do this too!). Hopefully he'll be flattered and will comply. Just ensure that you do it in such a manner that you seem charming -not pushy!
Find out if he's everything he's cracked up to be before you take time out of your schedule to see him. You don't want to think that you're meeting a guy with a full head of hair, only to find out that he only has one hair on his head, right?
Feel better!
-MJ
If you're ready to start dating again and you're thinking about online dating, here's a story for you:
A girl I know showed up at the bar to meet her date. When he walked in (20 minutes late!), he looked about 5 years older and 30 pounds heavier than ALL of his 5 pictures that were online. Although she wanted to stick it to him and tell him (and the entire bar) about his warped self-perception, she stuck it out, had a drink and then left with a handshake.
She came home from this date so disappointed that she called me crying. She really wanted to quit online dating, but I asked her to keep trying and I gave her this tip:
Before you meet someone in person for the first time, ask them if they have any recent pictures. When you get them, ask for specifics - where was this taken? Who was there? Ask really specific questions - not only will you seem interested (and you are), but you may even get to see more pictures if you play your cards right.
And if he says he doesn't have a recent picture, act really flirty and ask him to send one with his camera (men, you can do this too!). Hopefully he'll be flattered and will comply. Just ensure that you do it in such a manner that you seem charming -not pushy!
Find out if he's everything he's cracked up to be before you take time out of your schedule to see him. You don't want to think that you're meeting a guy with a full head of hair, only to find out that he only has one hair on his head, right?
Feel better!
-MJ
posted by MJ @ 5:30 PM
3 Comments:
At 10:26 AM,
Anonymous said…
If your friend really cried after going on this date, I don't think she is mature enough for online dating, or, as a matter of fact, dating in general! Chemistry or lack thereof is tricky and it happens for unexpected reasons.
Blaming that guy for it seems childish...especially because it is only normal to present yourself under the best light possible. I suspect she did the same.
Hopefully, she will grow from this bad experience and won't end up bitter and writing blogs on relationships!
At 10:48 AM,
Anonymous said…
To defend my friend: I agree that attraction is tricky, but tricking someone into going on a date with you by "presenting yourself in the best light possible" is sincerely a sign of immaturity. Showing yourself with a full head of hair and then showing up bald is just plain wrong.
Personally, I don't think lack of maturity is the reason. She has 2 kids and is a fine single mother. When you're 40-something and you're trying to get back on that horse...well, it's not easy. Disappointment IS part of the game, but if you're new to dating after 15 years of marriage, then it's understandable that her frustration would manifest itself into tears.
She is only human after all.
At 9:59 AM,
Anonymous said…
I'm pretty sure that's a guy.
The article was about getting current pictures before wasting time on a date. Not about chemistri or immaturity or blaming the guy.
I have been on some bad dates too.
MJ I dont think your bitter. You never bash men. I think this dude is bitter.
Why is a dude reading your site anyway.
lame!
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